Elevating Myself, Lowering My Boss: A Terrible Keigo Mistake!

Hello fellow warriors 'fighting' in Japan! 🇯🇵

I'm sure all of us have struggled with Keigo (honorific language). Textbooks teach a lot, but there's a classic mistake that I see even people who have been speaking Japanese for a long time make. This mistake is not just grammatically incorrect, but it can also make you look unprofessional, and even accidentally 'lower' your boss.

That is the terrible confusion between Sonkeigo (尊敬語 - respectful language) and Kenjougo (謙譲語 - humble language) when talking about people in your own company to outsiders.

🤔 An 'Awkward' Situation

Imagine you're talking to a client about your boss, Tanaka:

Client: 「この件、田中部長は何かおっしゃっていましたか？」(Regarding this matter, did Manager Tanaka say anything?) You reply: 「はい、田中部長もいらっしゃるとおっしゃっていました。」(Yes, Manager Tanaka also said he would be there.)

At first glance, it sounds very polite, right? You used いらっしゃる (Sonkeigo for 来る) and おっしゃる (Sonkeigo for 言う). But... this is a huge mistake! 😱

✨ Breaking Down the Problem: The 'Inside-Outside' Rule (Uchi-Soto)

When communicating with outsiders (clients, partners...), your entire company, from the lowest employee to the director, is considered 'inside' (内 - uchi). You must lower your 'inside' group to show respect to the 'outside' (外 - soto).

• 尊敬語 (Sonkeigo) 🙏: Used to elevate the actions of the other party (people outside your company).
• 謙譲語 (Kenjougo) 🙇: Used to lower the actions of yourself and people in your company.

In the example above, when you used Sonkeigo for your boss Tanaka, you inadvertently placed your boss on the same level as or even higher than the client. Logically, you 'lowered' the client - a huge taboo in Japanese business culture.

✅ The Correct 'Office Worker' Way

So what's the correct answer? You need to use Kenjougo.

Correct answer: 「はい、部長の田中も参ると申しておりました。」(Yes, our manager Tanaka also said he would be present.)

• 参る (mairu) is the Kenjougo for 行く/来る.
• 申す (mousu) is the Kenjougo for 言う.

Note: When talking about your boss to an outsider, you also don't need to add 「さん」or「様」, just use their title (e.g., 部長の田中) or their last name.

🔑 Quick Summary Table

Here are a few pairs of words you need to remember when talking about the actions of people in your company to outsiders:

Mastering this rule will not only help you avoid unnecessary misunderstandings but also show that you are truly knowledgeable and subtle in communication. Good luck staying confident and professional!