'Sou desu ne': Not just 'Yeah, that's right!'

You're enthusiastically talking to a Japanese person, and they nod along, constantly saying 'Sou desu ne' (そうですね). You think they completely agree 100%? 🤔

Maybe, but maybe not! With over 10 years of 'rolling around' here, I've realized that 'Sou desu ne' is one of the most versatile communication weapons, and it doesn't always mean 'I agree.'

Let's peel back the 3 main layers of meaning of this 'magic' phrase!

1. When it really means 'I agree' 👍

This is the most basic layer of meaning, just like in the textbooks. When the speaker fully agrees with your opinion, they will use 'Sou desu ne' with a firm, decisive intonation.

Example:

A:「今日の会議、長かったですね。」(Today's meeting was long, wasn't it?) B:「そうですね、本当に疲れました。」(That's right, I'm really tired.)

2. When it's a 'switch' to think 🧠

This is a very common use that you won't find in textbooks. When asked a question that requires thought, Japanese people often use 'Sou desu ne...' with a slightly drawn-out intonation.

It's like a polite way to 'buy time,' a signal that says: 'I heard you, and I'm processing the information, give me a few seconds.' It helps to avoid awkward silences and keeps the conversation flowing.

Example:

A:「このプロジェクト、どう進めましょうか？」(This project, how should we proceed?) B:「そうですね…。まずは関係部署にヒアリングから始めましょうか。」(Let's see... Shall we start by surveying the relevant departments first?)

3. When it's a 'stepping stone' for a contrary opinion 🥋

This is the most subtle and important nuance in a professional environment.

Instead of directly disagreeing like 'No, I don't think so,' Japanese people will use 'Sou desu ne' to show that they have acknowledged and respect your opinion. Then, they will gently present their different point of view, often accompanied by 'tada, ~' (however, ~) or '〜to iu kangaekata mo arimasu ne' (there is also the way of thinking that ~).

This way of speaking reduces the confrontational nature of the rebuttal, maintains harmony, and shows that you are a good listener.

Example:

A:「A案が一番効率的だと思います。」(I think Plan A is the most efficient.) B:「そうですね。ただ、B案の方がコストを抑えられるというメリットもありますね。」(Yes, I see your point. However, Plan B also has the advantage of being more cost-effective.)

Conclusion

'Sou desu ne' is a marvelous communication tool. It's both the glue that holds a conversation together and a shock absorber for differing opinions. Next time you hear someone say 'Sou desu ne,' don't rush to assume they agree. Listen to their intonation and what they say next, and you'll be able to read the other person with much more subtlety! 😉