逆ギレ (gyaku-gire): When the person in the wrong is the one who gets angry 😡

You've surely encountered this baffling situation:

You have plans to meet a friend at 2:00 PM. They rush to arrive at 2:30 PM. You just casually mention:

You: 「もう〜、30分も待ったよ！」(Geez, I've been waiting for 30 minutes!)

Instead of an apology, you get a 'storm of fury':

The latecomer: 「はぁ？こっちだって電車が遅れたんだよ！いちいちうるさいな！」(Huh? The train was late! Stop nagging, it's so annoying!)

The moment you realize you're the one being lectured even though you did nothing wrong... that's 逆ギレ (gyaku-gire).

What is 逆ギレ?

逆 (gyaku) means "reverse" or "opposite," and ギレ (gire) is a derivative of キレる (kireru), which means "to snap" or "to lose one's temper."

👉 逆ギレ is the act of "getting angry back." It's a term for the reaction of a person who, when their mistake is pointed out or they are cornered, turns the tables by getting angry and attacking the other person instead of admitting fault.

This is a rather common psychological defense mechanism. When their sore spot is hit (痛いところを突かれる), they feel embarrassed or inferior, and the easiest way to escape that feeling is to attack someone else to divert attention.

Classic Gyaku-gire Moments

You can witness gyaku-gire everywhere in daily life:

職場にて (At the workplace) 👔

• Boss: 「佐藤くん、この報告書、数字が間違ってるよ。」(Sato, the figures in this report are wrong.)
• Sato (instead of apologizing): 「えっ、でも部長が昨日急にやれって言ったからじゃないですか！時間がなかったんです！」(Huh? But isn't that because you suddenly told me to do it yesterday, Boss? I didn't have enough time!) 👈 This is Gyaku-gire

家庭にて (At home) 🏡

• Wife: 「あなた、また靴下を裏返しのまま洗濯機に入れたでしょ！」(Honey, you put your socks in the laundry inside out again!)
• Husband (instead of saying 'I'm sorry'): 「それくらい自分で直せばいいだろ！俺は仕事で疲れてるんだ！」(You can turn them right side out yourself! I'm tired from work!) 👈 A typical case of Gyaku-gire

What to do when you encounter Gyaku-gire?

The most important secret is don't get drawn into their anger. 🧘

They are getting angry because they're losing the argument. If you get angry back, you're falling right into their trap. Stay calm, take a deep breath, and return to the facts:

「うん、でも遅刻は遅刻だよね。」(Yeah, but being late is still being late.)

Recognizing 逆ギレ is a "superpower" that helps you avoid being psychologically manipulated and stay clear-headed in front of people who tend to be aggressive to cover their faults. Next time you see someone "getting angry back," you'll know right away: "Ah, they're about to lose! 😉"