割り切る (warikiru): When reason triumphs over emotion

If you've lived in Japan long enough, you've surely encountered many situations where you "know the truth, but your heart isn't at peace." A high-paying but boring job, a convenient but futureless relationship, or a friend who always annoys you but you can't seem to cut ties with.

In such times, the Japanese have an extremely effective psychological 'trick': 割り切る (warikiru).

✂️ What is 割り切る?

Literally, 割り切る means "to divide completely" (e.g., 10 is divisible by 2). But in daily conversation, it means "to draw a clear line, to accept a certain reality and not let personal feelings interfere anymore."

It's not quite 諦める (to give up) in a negative sense, but rather an active, rational action 🧠 to separate things, accept reality, and no longer torment yourself or have vain hopes ❤️.

Real-life situations

Let's see in what circumstances the Japanese use 割り切る!

1. In the workplace 🏢

This is a classic scenario. You're doing a job you have no passion for, but for some practical reason, you continue.

A: 「今の仕事、楽しい？」 (Is your current job fun?) B: 「うーん、楽しくはないけど、仕事は仕事と割り切ってる。給料もいいしね。」(Hmm, it's not fun, but I've come to terms with the fact that work is just work. The pay is good, too.)

Here, person B has used reason to "draw a line": Work is for earning money, not for finding joy. Accepting this fact helps them not feel miserable every day they go to work.

2. In relationships 💔

When you realize a relationship (friendship, romance) is going nowhere, but you still want to maintain it on some level.

「彼とは結婚できないってわかってる。だから、遊び相手として割り切って付き合ってる。」 (I know I can't marry him. So, I've accepted our relationship as just for fun and continue to see him.)

It might sound harsh, but this is how they protect themselves from hurt by setting a clear boundary for the relationship.

3. When dealing with difficult people 😒

When you have to work with a colleague or a boss you dislike.

「あの先輩、苦手だけど、仕事上の付き合いだって割り切れば、別に平気だよ。」 (I'm not a fan of that senior, but if I just treat it as a professional relationship, it's fine.)

💡 The key difference: 割り切る vs 諦める

• 諦める (Akirameru - To give up): Carries a passive, helpless nuance. You give up because you can't do anything else. Example: 「彼との結婚は諦めた」(I've given up on marrying him.) -> A feeling of failure, regret.
• 割り切る (Warikiru - To compartmentalize/accept): Carries an active, rational nuance. You use reason to accept the situation and not let it affect your emotions anymore. Example: 「彼とは結婚できないと割り切った」(I've accepted the fact that I can't marry him.) -> A feeling of clarity, of having made a decision and being ready to move on.

In short, 割り切る is an important life skill that helps Japanese people balance ideals and reality. It's a weapon to face life's imperfections with a 'lighter head' and a more practical approach. Next time you face a difficult situation, try to 割り切る!